Recipes: Gluten-Free Tea Time

We don't have the standard three meals here at Babylon Sanctum. We couldn't be that normal, could we? ;)

We have:
Breakfast
Lunch
Tea
Dinner
1am Meal

The only meals there with specified times are dinner and tea. They are also the only meals that multiple household members are expected to take part in.

Dinner is by 7pm. Tea time is 2:30.

I've been eating a lot of microwave soup for tea time lately. Here's today's :)


Neo-Peasant Soup
-a soup spoon of butter-substitute
-broth (chicken, beef, veggie, or whatever you like)
-broccoli (fresh)
-1 small potato
-green bean baby food
-sqaush baby food

Add everything to your microwave-safe bowl; use enough broth to cover all the veggies. Chop the broccoli and the potato relatively small, so they'll cook.

I use scissors for the broccoli and cut it directly into my bowl of broth. And a very sharp knife for the potatoes.

Microwave until potatoes are tender, approximately 6 minutes.

In that six minutes, you can, in this order:
-put the kettle on to boil
-get the tea pot and leaves or cups and bags ready
-make a toaster oven sandwich to go with your soup
-clean up the counter after prep

And when your soup is done, your microwave is going to be very steamy. Give it a quick 10 second wipe-down with a rag or paper towel, and you're ready to sit down to a full meal, quickly and easily prepared :)


Serving Ideas

Excellent spicing options are adobe, soul seasoning, or just plain salt and pepper.

If you want to, you can thicken the soup with some instant mashed potatoes and then thin it with a little milk-substitute or cream-substitute. This makes a heartier version, really good for a cold afternoon :) You can also do this and leave the potato out if you're out of potatoes or just don't want to bother with a potato.

It's really good topped with deli ham, too.

Serve with a warm baguette topped with ghee, or with a toaster-oven ham sandwich, recipe below. Dip the sandwich in the soup. It's awesome :D


Toaster Oven Ham Sandwich
-par-baked gluten-free baguette
-casein-free ghee
-thinly sliced deli ham

Cut a section of baguette in half, spread with ghee, and arrange ham on bread. Toast open-faced in toaster oven until baguette is crispy.


Notes
Butter substitute: We use casein-free ghee and/or Earth Balance.
Broth: You can make your own if you want to, but you're good to use a high quality brand of store-bought stuff. Read the ingredients list to make sure whole ingredients were used. It should look like this, not like this.

Baby food: Trust me. They will add a lot of depth of flavor and nutrition to your soup. Experiment with different baby food vegetables, or even meats if you're adventurous. It's a quick, simple, shelf-stable source of lots of vitamins. Use Beechnut. Alternatively, you could make your own vegetable purees and freeze them for things like this.

Instant mashed potatoes: Again, go for something high quality. The ingredients should look like this, not like this.

Milk substitute: We use almond milk.

Cream substitute: We use a cashew-based product.


---

There you go. Enjoy tea time :) What are you thankful for today?

Love, life, light and luck,
Mama Coyote

Funny Morning!

Elijah woke up giggling this morning :)

His Grandmere's comment is that he must really like Texas.

-Mama Coyote

Making (Personal) History

I am riding in a car, connected to a cell phone network. From my laptop. We're in Texas, on a long drive from one place to another.

This. Is just so amazing.

May I never get tired of things like this.

--Mama Coyote

Caffeine levels are critical!

I'm not allowed Vanilla Coke until after Pennsic and I've sworn off caffeine except in certain situations until after I try to donate blood.

And now, I'm stimming like mad.

Grrrr... Stupid chemical reactions between caffeine and vitamins!

Titi Bug

Outside Moment

I wish I could get pictures, but it's dark outside.

I brought the rug from the master bedroom outside and laid it out in the front yard, to get rained on and to have the sun beat down on it. It needs a good cleaning.

Elijah laid down on it and said he was going to sleep. "Goodnight, Mom. See you tomorrow!"

So we brought blankets and pillows out, and we are now lying down on the rug in the front yard, wrapped in a big Little Einsteins comforter and enjoying bedtime.

I need to thank my mediciation, and FlyLady, and Al-Anon. Before all of that, I would never have let this happen.

Thank you for this moment.

"Cloud fly high up in the sky. Going fast."

"Elijah's scared. It's dark out here."

"Elijah warm." "Elijah's warm?" "Right."

---

This didn't last too long; he decided he wanted water, and to go inside. So now he's in his room, playing with trains until he's ready to go to sleep. But it was such a wonderful moment.

I love my boy.

Goodnight,
Mama Coyote

From a couple weeks ago

I'm going through my email, and this is one I sent myself from my phone while Elijah and I were still at my parents' house:

"Elijah stayed w my dad this evening while Lyn and I went to mooch some Internet and play with the kittens. When we got back; E was asleep in my bed. Dad says he set up a chair and tv tray, spent two or tree minutes making sure he had everything in place, including the rug and his trains. Then sat down and said, "Eggs and rice please.". After eating his eggs and rice, he went into the room he and I are staying in, turned on the light, and put himself to bed. Dad thought he'd be back in a minute, but when he went to check on him, he was asleep."

He's so awesome :)

--Mama Coyote

I wish I could record straight to DVD

I think Mama C would enjoy Masterpiece Mystery and Are You Being Served? BritComs make lots of things better.

You, little boy.

We're sitting at the dining table, eating together, and Elijah looks at me: "What are you thankful for, Mama?"

Care Bears

Elijah keeps saying, "A pig truck!" I look up, and there is indeed a pig truck on Care Bears. "A pig truck are beautiful," says Elijah.

When the people come out of the walls...

Our main bathroom is completely torn out. The half bath still has its toilet, but nothing else... and the easiest way to get to the toilet is to go into the main bathroom through the hall door and duck through the torn out wall. This makes me giggle a lot. It amuses me every time I go through there.

Elijah followed me today, but I told him to stay out in the hall. There's a hole in the bathroom floor. It's not too dangerous to the adults, but to a toddler, it's a great gaping path straight to the basement floor. So he's standing there in the hall, and he says, "There's no wall in there! Mama's stuck. Mama's in the wall!"

:D

--Mama Coyote

"Get out of the way, I'm a bus!!"

Elijah watched me playing Grand Theft Auto: Vice City.

Apparently I said the above a few too many times after I'd hijacked a bus ;)

Mama Coyote

Internet fail

Uncle Cat's PC doesn't get very good internet signal anymore, which means Titi Bug has been playing less WoW and more Sims 2 (and longing for Sims 3 and/or expansion packs). Babies are still cuter in person, but now I find myself desperately trying to play two families so that their teens can get married and stuff.

...I'm not sure what this says about me.

Catching up in a moment of Internet-ness.

"Where's Elijah?" from under the pillows: "He's hiding behind."

"Have a go downstairs, see a clean washer."

More quotes.

"I feel so happy!"

"Beanie! You like your food!"

Elijah asked me, "What's that?" about a satellite dish. "It's a satellite dish." "A SATELLITE DISH?!?!?! Oh my goodness!!!"

Charlie got too packed with dirt again to work, and Elijah brought him to me. "He's hurt!"

"Charlie's covered in dirt!"

We're watching Punky Brewster :D

--Mama Coyote

Another quote.

"Packaw John is /climbing/!"

Papaw John also has a new name, it seems :)

--Mama Coyote

A day of pools and quotes.

"Hi, bigger Mama!"
"Hi, littler Elijah."

"Come on, Grandmere, let's go in the pool!"

"Try'n go Grandmere's house find Emily!"

"NO DADDY!!! SEE PICTURE OF THOMAS!" (When he didn't want to talk to Daddy B on the phone, and wanted to see Thomas on Grandmere's computer.)

"Fred is cute!" Fred is a cat.

"Hi, bigger Grandmere!"

"Come on, Mama, go inside try'n eat eggs."

Elijah, Remmy, Beanie and I are in Kentucky until further notice, for the artist Sharaya Miracle's first gallery showing, and then to be out of the way of the reconstruction at the house (to repair the damage done during mold remediation).

There is lots of time for relaxation, crafts, computer time, and reading. It's good.

But I miss my cat, I miss Morning, I miss my family.

I love you guys. I'll see you when I get home :)

--Mama Coyote

The two impediments to productivity today...

A cat blocking my sewing machine and Muppets/Sesame Street Nostalgia on Youtube. And people wonder why I'm so lazy.

Towel Day

Happy Towel Day, everyone!

--Mama Coyote

Baby animals make everything better

Zooborns has saved my day. This was a cranky, lazy day, where I spent most of the day in bed playing WoW. Then, I looked at baby aye-ayes and tigers and dik-diks (seriously, an antelope the size of a small dog, look them up, I want one now, but the cats would eat it).

So the moral of the story is: when in doubt, contemplate baby critters of your favorite species.

Breakfast

"Hi train. You look happy!" Oh, small child. You're so awesome.

I'm sitting at a wonderfully clear dining table. I need to empty the dishwasher and reboot the laundry and spend a few minutes decluttering the bedroom... then I will sit, and I will braid yarn. Actually, first, I'll most likely talk to the remodeling guy who's going to show up. But after that! I will braid yarn.

Ummm. Hi.

This is not a particularly useful post.

But hi.

There's a little boy dancing at the table. He's amazing :)

--Mama Coyote

Titi Bug doesn't have issues, she has a subscription

So, I'm trying to figure out why I'm always sick. One person, a Pagan Reverend who is like a second (or rather, at this point, 18th) mother to me, suggested I get checked for Lyme's, which may be dormant, and Lupus (oh, God, please, not Lupus). Also, B12 and B6, which I probably need more of, being mixed and part Native American. I'm also going to try and take a few different cleansing baths and see if that won't at least help me.

I guess it would make sense if I have Lyme's and didn't know it. I remember, back after Ap went off to boot camp and I was often alone in the house and bored silly, I'd walk what must have been five miles to the library to surf the net and sit in good A/C. Once, while sitting at the computer, I reached up to play with my earrings, like I do when I'm thinking and I felt what I thought was a scab. I picked at it and got a tick in my hand. I crushed it between my thumbnails and thought little more of it. Not long after that, Tim and I moved out and started going to school and trying to keep my own household and I thought the stress made me sick. Maybe it was Lyme's and that's what's wrong with me.

In either case, I'm going to try attacking this from both sides. I have plans for a Chaplet for my own purposes. I'll post about it here and maybe that will encourage Mama C and M. to make more craft posts (*nudgenudge* C'mon, ladies, don't leave me hanging). With any luck, that'll give me a spiritual edge while the doctor and new vitamins give me a physical edge. I'll post more when I have it.

--Titi Bug

"Rice cake! Yummy rice cake! Kyle, you try a rice cake?"

"Elijah is happy!"

I had multiple dreams this morning. There was one about wandering around a convention with Anthony Hopkins, pretty much forgetting I was there for Camarilla games, because spending my time with Anthony Hopkins was way more interesting, especially back in his room...

And in another dream, I found a spinning wheel of this style. Except with dreamworld modifications. It was not very awesome to use, and I kept holding the roving too tight (which is something I do in real life). So in my dream, I was practicing spinning. For real. It was kind of awesome.

But not as awesome as spending my nights with Anthony Hopkins...

--Mama Coyote

"Hi Mama, nice to meet you. I'm Elijah!"

"Elijah close the eyes!"

And he can count!! He can count! I'm so excited. He counted my fingers, and my lips. It was so awesome!

"Mama making eggs for Elijah!"

"Elijah try'n eat eggs."

My joints are so very swollen this morning, and there was no purring kitten to soften my morning (he was out in the living room). But there was a very happy little boy who wanted to play peekaboo and talk about trains and counting and lips and eyes and fingers :)

The house feels lighter after its surgery. I want to take the opportunity to have built-in shelves in the bathrooms, and I really, really want to put in frosted glass between the rooms and the stairwell, because it's really nice to have it so open and airy and bright. But that's probably not going to happen ;)

Good morning. Time to declutter now, before this afternoon's vet appointment of insanity. We're taking two dogs and two cats, all at once, to get checked over for ringworm. And Remmy needs shots. And I need to pick up new medicine for Beanie because the mold guys sealed up the closet that the medicine was in, and we can't unseal it until the industrial hygienist comes back to check things out.

Hello, world!

--Mama Coyote

Mold Remediation and Thoughts

"Play in the park today, Mama.". Certainly, little boy

The mold remediation people are here, and Aaron Neville is playing on the CD player next to me. They've sealed off my bedroom... Which isn't really awesome, because all three dogs and my computer are in there. I'm blogging from my phone (which is awesome).

This is a reminder to myself: I want to do an intro page, a "what and who this blog is about" page. Profiles and pictures (or avatars) of everyone and all the animals, and little introsucrions, links to their blogs, business, a charity, whatever. Mayne some recommended links. I think it'd be awesome. And this is a big crew to keep straight without a guide :)

-Mama Coyote

A peanutbutter moment.

Elijah jumps up and down in front of the refrigerator, staring up at the peanut butter way up high. "Little Elijah can't reach!"

I need to get a video of him talking. I want to remember how strange his modulation is, and I just can't do that in text.

-Mama Coyote

Thanks

I want to write a post, but I keep thinking I should write something really awesome and profound, and that just plain isn't happening this morning. My thoughts keep flying away halfway through, and my eyes are feeling heavy. It's been a week of storms and it's going to continue. I love it, but the rollercoaster air pressure takes its toll.

I want to write some sort of really awesome, informative post about living in a commune, about living a poly relationship, about raising a child. I want to write about how medicinal marijuana should be legal OR I should live in DC. I honestly don't understand why the painkiller that has the least likelihood of destroying my kidneys and liver is still illegal. That just makes no sense to me.

I want to write about dog training, and that we're taking two dogs and two cats to the vet on Friday, and the crafts I'm doing. I want to write about Elijah's development, about the changes in the household and the family, about food. But for some reason I just can't seem to do it.

Maybe if I set an alarm on my phone ;)

I really should make a crafts post. Maybe that's what I'll do next.

To everyone else -- thank you so much for posting. I love that we can make this a co-operative project. The more we write here, the more memories we've recorded and can look back on. Thank you all.

Daddy B - Thank you. You know why.

Daddy C - Thank you for sticking with us, thank you for being patient with me, thank you for all your help.

Brother Emo - Thank you for your love, and the joy you bring to my life. Thank you for talking, and thank you for being real.

Maddy - Thank you for sticking around. Thank you for helping me when I'm overwhelmed, and thank you for jumping right in and doing things and providing an example to me that it's possible to finish projects.

Jag - Thank you for the circus, and for our random talks and sharings of music. Thank you for being around.

Ti Ti Bug - Thank you for being Puerto Rican :D

Uncle Cat - Thank you for coke floats :)

Mama T - Thank you for being a role model. For not being one of those horrible mothers. For being a positive role model instead of a negative one for me.

And thank you all for loving Elijah. Thank you for contributing to the core of this household.

--Mama Coyote

Silly Clowns, Scary Stunts, and Happy Elephants!

This past Sunday I was lucky enough to take Mama Coyote to her first circus show ever!

It was raining a bit and we were told the show was sold out...which kinda sucked, but then this man in a small car came around saying that they were gonna do another show at 7:30, which was pretty cool because they were not supposed to have a show at that time.

I've always wondered how life in a circus would be like. It must be fun, getting to play with animals, travelling all the time and getting to see new places. Yet, something tells me that it must be a bit depressing as well.

Anyways, we had pretty good seats because we got VIP seating...nifty huh?

The show started with a couple of tiger trainers, who had about 10 tigers with them. This was one of my favorite parts of the show...probably cause I like tigers a lot. The female trainer was very nice to the tigers, but the guy seemed a little mean. Yet, the tigers were very well trained, which is pretty amazing considering their predatory and wild nature.

After that they had some trapecists? I'm not sure if that's the correct term or not...but that doesn't really matter. This part was also a lot of fun, and I remember hearing that it was a family performing together, which I thought was kinda cool.

There were a variety of clown acts, which I won't get too deep into because they were mostly just fillers in between the real cool stuff...hehe, plus both of us agreed that clowns are silly and not that funny.

There was another trainer lady who came out with a camel, a horse, 2 ponies and 2 poodles. She didn't seem to be as good of a trainer as the tiger lady, especially because her tiny ponies seemed confused and would go berserk every now and then and tried headbutting the larger horse. The poodles were fun too.

While on the topic of poodles, and dogs overall, there was this other lady that came out with a bunch of them later on. She was riding on a small pink car, which looked like an oversized version of those Barbie toy cars. Most of her poodles had pink fur too...except for that one token black poodle...who was the super poodle, and super excited. This part of the show was fun, and there was this adorable little poodle pup who was hopping through metal rings and going haywire all over the place.

At one point they finally brought out the elephants! We had seen one of them outside while we were waiting to buy tickets, and they were offering rides before the show too. This was pretty cool because they had one of the trainers riding one of the elephants bareback as they came out. It was a pretty nice show, and elephants are just plain awesome. I made the observation that they always look happy for some reason...must be something about the way their mouths are shaped.

They also had another group of trapecists or acrobats, or whatever you want to call them. They were a larger group, all female for the exception of a young boy amongst them. They were dressed like pirates when they came out...which totally had me like "WTF?!?!?" when they first came out. However, their show was one of the better ones in my opinion. It was just cool to see how they appeared to be "floating" in the air. One of them was doing her tricks on what looked like a fishing net...maybe it had to do something with the pirate theme, but it was pretty cool.

To end the whole thing, they brought out this large metal cage globe thingy that looked straight out of a Mad Max movie. They had a couple of people with motorcycles inside. Another bike came out riding his motorcycle while the cage was brought out and then went inside once it was set up. One of them started riding at a fast pace inside the cage, slightly above the heads of the other two. My heart skipped a beat every now and then as I waited for something awful to happen in front of my eyes!

Suddenly, the biker fell off his bike as he was coming to a stop. The crowd fell silent. I watched nervously, praying silently that he was ok. After a few minutes he got back up with the help of the other bikers and some of other circus folk that rushed to his help. People clapped loudly as he stood up and exited the cage.

The show went on with other two bikers pulling off some pretty cool stunts inside the cage. The biker in green turned out to be a 12 yeard old girl! I thought that was pretty hardcore.

To top it all off they did the classic "cannon ball man" stunt. They brought out this huge cannon that was attached to a truck and had this guy go inside. They set up a net on the other end and "BOOM!" The guy went up flying in the air and landed safely on the net. It was kinda cool, but that thing was pretty freaking loud too!

Overall I had tons of fun, and it was kinda nice to get some bonding time with Mama C...plus now I can proudly say that I took her to her first circus show ever! :D

Signing off...

Jag

Joy

The scent of honeysuckle just came in through my window :D

Oh hello world.

So far this morning, Elijah has:

Run up to me... or into me, depending on your perspective... licked me... then asked for a shirt.

Said, "It's /broken/!" while he was out of my sight... oh my. (It turned out to just be a cat toy. And I fixed it. Kinda.)

Tried to put a hat on as a shirt.

Waved and said hi... to his belly.

Said, "Cat in the Hat /everywhere/!"

Said, "Help eyes!" because he'd put applesauce in them.

And we've only been up for two hours.

Oh hai o.O

:)

--Mama Coyote

I've watched cassette tapes go from widely used to almost non-existent. I've also now found that in my household, it's hard to find a CD player, or a place to put the few CDs I do still have. We also have three VHS tapes that I've had for years, but nothing to play them on.

Things come and go so fast now--I'm only 27. That's really young. It's not like I'm 87. When I think of all the things my grampa saw... wow.

What else will I see come and go?

The CD player in the dining room plays Aaron Neville in the mornings. I don't know why.

-Mama Coyote

A morning :)

Because of the work being done on the house, Elijah is temporarily sleeping in a playpen in my room. The past two mornings, he has climbed out of the playpen and into my bed. I have woken up to, "Good morning, Mama! You look happy!"

And just now he said, "Mama making eggs for Elijah!"

How can I resist?

Time to make breakfast :)

-Mama Coyote

Computer Names?

So, I bought parts for a new computer today. I need a name for it though.

We've got a tradition of naming our computers after scifi droids, robots, and computers.

So far, I'm leaning towards going with HK-47. He's funny. My computer is gonna be black, red, and big. And AWESOME. Don't forget AWESOME.

What?

We just got kicked out of an empty skatepark for practicing parkour. Where are the parkour parks?

Children and Drugs

I'm trying to find out the correlation between childens' minds and psychedelics, disassociatives, and deliriants. Reading what others have posted about what this child is saying, I'm wondering if he's tripping constantly, or if he's just that damn weird.

LOCKDOWN

WE ARE ON CINNAMONING LOCKDOWN

THIS IS LIKE DEFCON 1 HERE

NO

MORE LIKE DEFCON -5

YEAH, IT'S THAT SERIOUS

Aloe Vera Drink

I finally figured out what bothers me about it. It smells and tastes like Grape Koolaid!

Two Posts in One: Awesome Mother's Day & Containment Rooms

Sunday was a great day, even though I'd been up late the night before. I managed to sleep well, and get up early enough to get going and get out the door. Some friends of ours were headed to the Maryland Sheep & Wool Festival, and let me ride along. Conversational topics on the drive were geared toward energy work, urban witchcraft, and creation. It was great.

We wandered, and played, and watched a sheepdog demonstration. Yet again, I had a reminder of why I should be working with my dogs every day; and yesterday and today, I have stuck to that. At least 5 minutes a day with each dog is not nearly enough, but it's certainly better than nothing.

I ended up bringing home some handfuls of roving, the knowledge of a drop spindle lesson and a wheel-spinning spindle, and a small frame loom. I've been trying to figure out and learn some techniques. And I need to grab my drop spindle and work with it, but right now I'm just longing for a wheel. It was so very much easier and more fun than using a drop spindle.

I also brought home a pin that says, "I spin therefore I am." I thought it entirely appropriate for this household, whether I'm spinning fiber or not ;)

When I got home, Daddy B had done 8 loads of laundry (and put them away!), played with Elijah a lot, and tidied things up. And Daddy C had made bacon before he had to go to work. It was a great thing to come home to. I was able to settle down and eat, and then play, and sleep.

Thank you to all my boys and to my mother and to my friends for my awesome mother's day :)


And as for the containment rooms... multiple parts of the house are sealed off with plastic because an industrial hygienist said, 'There is mold. Seal it off now.' There are very loud air-cleaning machines that are, well, loud. And they shake the floor. And it's very interesting and strange and I cannot wait for all the work to get done. We'll have two remodeled bathrooms by the end of it all, and hopefully the house-cancer that is mold will be eradicated from the house for good.


I also want to take this opportunity to rearrange Elijah's room and possibly take the bookshelf out of it. His room is so tiny that space is at a premium. I want to put up more of the IKEA Wall Pockets to get the books off the shelves but keep them on the walls. And I'm not sure what other methods to use to store things. But I want Elijah to have plenty of floor space to build with his trains. A small loft bed would help a lot. I really want to attach a slide to a small loft bed for him, too :)

I should make his closet usable again. Right now it's full of stuff he's not using, but if I clean it out I can use its shelves for books and school stuff.

Any other small-space storage ideas are welcome. I'm trying to figure out multiple ways to use shoe pocket things, too. Lots of toys, books, office supplies, and random other stuff in this house, and they all need places to live. Labeled boxes are extremely useful, too. These are things I need to remember.

Perhaps if Elijah's bookshelf comes into the dining room where we already have a short bookshelf, put the bookshelf fish tank on the middle shelf, and then labeled boxes full of office supplies, spices, whatever else we need to have right next to the table.

As strange as it may sound, getting a bigger TV (some day) will help us regain some space in the living room. Right now, our TV is an old CRT, and taking up a lot of space. A flatscreen hanging on the wall will free up a lot of space.

Hm. I'm just rambling now. Oh well. This will make sense to people who live here... and to people who don't, once things get done and I take new pictures :)

I have so many ideas. On days like today, when I feel good (thanks to plenty of sleep and a nice long walk with the dogs), I want to do everything. I want to make everything, and make our space happier and healthier. I need to slow down and do it a little bit at a time.

I love you all, my family. Thank you for my life.

KISSES!!!!

My current favorite thing to do to Elijah is kiss him. Apparently, he loves it if you kiss his ear, to the point where he'll squirm away, talking about how "it tickles!" then run back over, grab your head, and put your face right back so your lips are over his ear again. He also does this on command if I say "Kiss ear!" So cute! Can he stay this way forever?

Titi Bug is other-homesick

Bless me, Mama C, for I have strayed. It's been nearly fourteen days since I last packed the Pink Duffle of Squee with the Petticoat of Awesome and the Tarot Deck of Win and I miss baby snuggles and Coyote hugs and rice with sugar and peanut butter. Heck, I even miss being awoken by a dog crawling all over me and sticking dewclaws in sensitive places and Brother Emo's profane ranting at the XBOX.

If I say some rosaries, can I come other-home?

Titi Bug, the Uncle-Cat-Herder

Talkative

"Don't eat a bug!!"

Sure thing, little man. Thanks for the advice ;)

-Mama Coyote

Waffles & Playgrounds

Good morning. It is a morning.

I have 45 gigs of music on shuffle right now. This should be interesting.

I don't think I actually have anything interesting to say right now, but if I don't try to post when I feel like it, then... er... well, nothing bad will happen and the world will continue just as it is. But! Hello. This is a blog post.

I've fallen down in routines lately, in making sure there's breakfast, lunch, AND dinner. We're doing better; and after dinner, we've been going to the playground. Elijah loves to "swing high!" and play in the sand.

I made waffles yesterday! Gluten-free, dairy-free ones, too. From a mix. But the mix tasted awful, so I added applesauce, extra sugar, a little vanilla extract (that Grandmere made!), and a lot of cinnamon. They were well-received by the family, and I don't expect that there are any left this morning. Which probably means I'm making more today.

I want to try this recipe: Glad GFCF all-purpose flour

That website is pretty awesome. I think it's going to help a lot.

Update on the bathroom renovation: The renovators found mold. We're in the processing of figuring out how to take care of that and how to pay for it. Sigh.

Out for now,
Mama Coyote

Oh Baby!

Favorite moment from the past weekend: Baby checking out the cave in the basement, going back and forth between mom and dad, and talking about a party he was going to have with blueberry pie. I never found out where that awesome party was :)

And there was the piano. He played on it a while. It can make different sounds; flute, organ, electric piano, etc. He looked at me at one point and said "Be careful Maddy! Push the buttons!" And then we learned that on pianos, they're called keys, not buttons. And then he randomly asked "What if I get lost?" but seemed pretty content with my response. "You can't get lost, you're right here, silly!"

And then the piano went to "sleep". And Baby was sad.

Now back to a group paper I have to write today, without any group input. Murderous rampages, anyone?

Life

Elijah is now learning to get his own rice. He shouts, "Alchemy!" at people in hopes that they will respond. He did this to a little boy at Gymboree and the little boy seemed baffled. This was also his response to recovering from a sugar crash: "Hi Mama." Turn to Daddy, "Alchemy!" :)

My hair is pink and purple; Elijah says, "Pink's a silly color!" Daddy C is teaching him that pink is a beautiful color.

E now asks for things, "May I have milk please?" And says, "Thank you." without prompting. He talks a lot, most of the time quoting Care Bears or Thomas the Tank Engine.

He says that Christmas lights are beautiful and he's loving Christmas episodes of Thomas right now. For many things that he likes, he says, "Beautiful!"

He understands the concepts of bigger and little. He's amazed that Daddy can draw him a train, and he asks Mama to draw balloons a lot. Bigger balloons and star balloons, most of the time.

We've had no major crises for three weeks or so, so everyone remaining has chilled out and we've been able to work on home improvements. The bathroom is getting completely remodeled this week, and the basement is shaping up into a clean, nice-smelling place to hang out. Ti Ti Bug and Nanny M and Mama and Daddy B are hanging out down here while Daddy C and Brother Emo are at work. Uncle Cat is playing video games upstairs. It's amazing to have two sitting areas, a place to go to do quiet things--chatting, writing, sewing--while someone's upstairs using the loud TV.

I was able to build a permanent blanket fort under the stairs, and we have the HEPA vacuum working again. AND a a HEPA air purifier/filter thinger... it cycles the air in the basement multiple times an hour. It's so awesome.

And just to make me smile, I have cinnamon-scented carpet powder :)

Ti Ti Bug wants everyone to know that Uncle Cat is a bad influence. On everything! ;)

What?

There's snow on the ground.

I don't even know how to react to that.

-Mama Coyote

Happy Saint Patrick's Day

In bar. Have cider! Omnomnom :)

-Mama Coyote

WalMart Fish

So, this story starts with me buying a fish at Walmart, which is my own bit of special dumb, I know. But that's not the important part...

The guy took water out of A DIFFERENT TANK and then put the poor guppy in it!

And charged me for two glass shrimp, bu only gave me one...

Also, their fiddler crabs are freshwater, apparently :p

And they have magic bala sharks that only grow to 8 inches... And columbian shark cats that only get to an amazing SIX inches :p

Oh dear.

-Mama Coyote

Dancing

The Little Tornado decided to see what I was doing over on my computer. He really didn't have a whole lot to look at apart from my music player.

He has, however, learned what type of music I listen to by me saying it all the time, and learned to recognize the genre when I'm listen to it.

So, this morning, when he peeked onto my screen, he exclaimed "Dubstep!" and tried to rave with me.

>mfw

Personal - Feel free to skip over

I have Asperger's. It's extremely mild so it isn't too much of a problem (until I get into a romantic relationship).

I also get paranoid and anxious about the fragility of life and how easily a life can be taken by random chance.

If I tell someone about my problems (which number far more than listed above), I don't want to hear about their problems or how they know how I feel, because (READER ADVISORY: TEENAGE ANGST IMMINENT) they don't. They don't see the world how I see it, they see it with their own perceptions.

Don't tell me how you know how I feel.

Don't tell me it's "normal" because "normal" is a construct of modern society, which is as fluid and mercurial as the pattern (or lack thereof) of gas molecule movement.

Just tell me things will be alright.

I just want to know things will be alright.

I can't stand losing anyone I love.

Unlike Mama Coyote...

I am grumpy. Not at family, at everything. It's quarter to ten and I'm awake. There is something inherently wrong with the situation.

Borderlands time? I think so. That, or Halo: Reach.

Tea?

Good morning, world. Why I am awake I do not know. Rather, why I am awake and relatively cheerful, but I'll take it, because being cranky at my family is a bad idea and makes everyone miserable.

I do not seem to be particularly coherent this morning, but I'm going to post anyway ;)

Things that have been keeping me sane lately:
-Warning! Readers Advisory!
-Stepables (I have PLANS!)
-the thought of making woven rag rugs some day (as if I don't have enough crafts projects)
-ClickerTraining.com
-the idea of a dog couch
-the idea of training all the dogs to go to mats when someone knocks at the door

Behold!

I am Brother Emo of the Order of Flippy Hair. I am Elijah's (sort of) older brother. I will post much silliness of the little Tornado. Soon, our antics will be widely known.

Advice

I had a long chat with my country-girl aunt Loretta from Kentucky, yesterday. She's a widow now, alone in her house and trying to keep going after losing a husband and a son. She raised five kids and kept a household running for many years. Her kids and grandkids are happy people, and I look up to her a lot.

I asked her for her housekeeping advice, and was rewarded with the best/most amusing advice ever:

"If something's dirty, clean it. If it didn't get clean the first time, clean it again. If that exhausts you, find a better way of doing it."

She has also said:

"Every new mother feels like she'll never figure it out, but you will. Just do it. One day, you'll just get it."

And:

"You can't do it all at once. Don't worry about it. Do it tomorrow."

I love that woman :)

-Mama Coyote

Guest Post - Captain Space Command

This is something a friend wrote, and since it talks about Elijah I asked if I could repost it here. Amanda is another Asperger's kid, like me, and her perspective on the world can be very interesting.

Please enjoy this post, it's wonderfully written :)

-Mama Coyote

---
[quote]

Captain Space-Command
by Amanda Spikol on Wednesday, February 9, 2011 at 10:44pm
Today I went out and about shopping with Melissa and while we were at the mall, I said, "You know that stage you reach when you get over the sheer utter joy of realizing that now you're an adult and you can do whatever you want? Yeah, I never reached that stage." (This was after buying fuzzy blue slipper-boots (on sale, $7!) and as I was about to get a blue raspberry lemonade at the Food Court)

And so my whole apartment was spotless and nice from cleaning today and after Melissa left I changed into sleep clothes to curl up in my chair and work on things with the TV on. I picked out my favorite shirt, a black hockey jersey I got at Goodwill in Swarthmore in autumn 2000, it's so worn that the logo is unrecognizable but I love it. I put on my favorite pajama pants, deep purple with various-color sleepy owls on, and thick soft flannel. Then, I put on my new fuzzy blue slipper-boots.

My feet looked like moon feet in these and I was so happy.

The boots were warm and the bottoms had slipper-sock tread dots. On my way out to the den, I passed by a mirror and got a good look at myself. I looked like Captain Space-Command. Really, literally, I looked like the kind of person that you might see walking down Main Street to the deli, wearing a helmet covered in duct tape and being minded by a handler. I looked like a 5 year-old about to curl up under Smurfs(TM) sheets, and squinch her eyes closed from lights-out until morning, so the snow will come.

I couldn't be happier.

I've no one to impress; my cat has never expressed interest in what I'm wearing. I considered blogging about it maybe, because the words appeared in my head along with the visuals, my narration. Then, I sat down at the Internet, and messed about with email, answered some tweets, and minded Facebook. Ashley posted a picture of Elijah sleeping in a bed, dressed in fuzzy blue pajamas with space things on; Little Captain Space-Command.

Sometimes, I feel so bad about things, and wish I'd of been born these days, when kids like me have folks to bring them up right, understanding how they happen to interface with the world. Sometimes, I look at Elijah and I feel like it's gonna be ok for him, and maybe he can look up at adults in a few years, and realize if that's how far we all got without help, there's nothing he won't be able to do.

He could go to space if he wanted someday.

[endquote]

Gluten and Dairy-Free Hot Breakfasts

I'm trying to get Elijah away from cold cereal for breakfast... lunch... dinner... snacks... :) Perhaps it's true for all toddlers, but it's definitely true for those of us with SPD: When we find a food we like the feel and taste of, we stick with it. In an attempt to combat this rigidity of thought in both myself and Elijah, I am trying to make sure we have healthy hot breakfasts with at least a little variety.

This is not as easy as you would think, considering my morning laziness and sensory-driven personal desire to stick with one thing over and over as well.

Here are some of the things we eat for breakfast.

Tomagi Gohan
-cooked rice
-1 raw egg
-toppings: Furikake, adobo, gf soy sauce, gf tamari, BBQ sauce

This is a very simple meal. Place cooked rice in a covered microwave-safe bowl with a sprinkle of water. Heat for 1-2 minutes until rice is steaming hot. Stir in one raw egg very thoroughly, then replace cover. Let sit until egg is cooked. Top with your choice of yumminess.


Microwave-able Gluten-Free Oatmeal
-certified gf oatmeal
-water or milk-replacement of your choice
-toppings: soy or coconut creamer, brown sugar, honey, cinnamon

Regular oatmeal is generally thought to be heavily contaminated with wheat flour, so only certified gluten-free oatmeal is currently considered safe in my household.
Rolled oats microwave just fine as far as we're concerned. Place the desired serving of oats and water per the instructions on the box in a microwaveable bowl, cover, and microwave one minute at a time until you determine how long your microwave takes.
You can also cook oatmeal in a neuro-fuzzy rice cooker and if the machine has a timer, set it up the night before to be ready for morning, but I haven't tried this yet and it's been years since I cooked steel-cut oats in a rice cooker.
Elijah likes his with a lot of honey and cinnamon. I prefer brown sugar and soy or coconut creamer. We may try apples and other fruits soon.


Fried Eggs
-eggs (2-3 per person, in my house)
-bacon grease
-salt
-adobo
-sides: bacon, tomatoes, mushrooms, black beans

Bacon grease is my usual butter-replacement for frying foods. I like my eggs over-easy; Elijah can't stand that texture and prefers his broken and well-done. Mushrooms raw or sauteed in bacon grease are a wonderful accompaniment to fried eggs.



Scrambled Eggs
-eggs (1-4 per person, depending on the day and the phase of the moon and the alignment of the stars...)
-rice milk (optional)
-bacon grease
-salt or adobo (Elijah prefers adobo with cumin)
-accompaniments: tortilla chips, salsa

Everyone in the house has a different way of making scrambled eggs. I scramble mine in a bowl with a little rice milk and some salt and then pour them into the hot bacon grease in the pan. Daddy C scrambles them straight in the pan. I cook them a little soft, he usually browns them a little.

A common plating in our house is: A handful of tortilla chips on the plate, top with eggs and salsa. Very tasty!



Apples & Peanutbutter
-apple
-peanutbutter
-toppings: cinnamon, honey

Slice apples, spread with peanutbutter. Simple :) I know cinnamon sounds like a strange topping for this, but someone recommended it once, and I found that it gave the peanutbutter just that much more depth.

Of having one foot in the house and one foot out

I've been told to introduce myself before I post. I'm E.'s "Auntie Bug". I'm not really a mother to him, but I'm not sure I'm indulgent or patient enough to be the "cool aunt" yet. He's probably a little young to need a cool aunt, still, anyway. I'm not diagnosed yet, but I may or may not be high-functioning. I don't officially live here, except on weekends. But, I guess I'm just as much family as everybody here.

Cat penguins.

Elijah just called a tuxedo cat "cat penguin".

Some quotes.

Daddy B: Dramaticism: It's like narcissism, but for theatre majors!

--

Elijah: Mama swing! [squeals] HAPPY, HAPPY, HAPPY, HAPPY!

--

Elijah: 1, 3, 4, 5, Z!!!

--

Elijah: I need a magic wand, please.

Thoughts

I hate what I write, but I've promised myself that I'll post this once I'm done. We'll see how this goes.

It's Valentine's day (I've never really liked this holiday anyway) and it's about love. I've refrained from posting about what happened, but what better day, really, to post about one for whom love was everything? So here goes.

What happened was awful. I've gone through a range of emotions practically every day. Some days, I feel like I shouldn't even be this hurt. I didn't know him nearly as well or as long as anyone here. I think that's what hurts the most. There was so much more time I wanted with him, so many more things I wanted to talk about, to tell him. I miss him.

What happened with his ex... I didn't lie. I pity her. I scorn her and judge her, but I pity her. My loyalty is everything to me, and she disgraced the name of someone I love. She lied in memory of one who had pain in his eyes anytime he couldn't tell someone something, anything, because of orders. She stood up there and talked about his love for everyone, while helping keep the people he loved hidden. The entire weekend was living hypocrisy. That's what I hate most.

I probably haven't dealt very well with it all. I'm not at the house right now, for more reasons that just this, but I've pulled away. It's what I do best; I've done it before and I'll probably do it again. I'm pretty self-sufficient and when something goes wrong I go back to just me. I still talk to people, still see them at game, which is a step in the right direction I guess. It's hard not to see it as our room anymore, Jes has it now. I hope he takes care of it.

It's hard to see the family anymore without him there. He took care of all of us, forgetting his own worries to carry ours. In his absence, we all have to do our part to take his place. I know I'm doing awfully at it right now, I hope I can find the strength to.

He taught me more than I can possibly admit. He taught me that you CAN truly love more than one person at a time. I get that now. I wish I had understood it sooner. He taught me patience and persistence, with even the most knuckleheaded. Seriously. It was impossible to be around him and not learn that. He taught me what it was to really let go, to trust someone completely. That part of me will always be his. I don't think anyone else will be able to get that close.

I don't really know what else to say. He told me he wanted me to be happy, with or without him. I'll visit him every time I drive through, and maybe sometimes even when I'm not. But I'll try to do what he wanted.

And I know he didn't just want that for me.

~M

Barometer of days.

E is lining his trains up side by side, rather than like a train. That usually means a particularly strong rigid-thinking day, where extra patience is needed.

The temperature is supposed to rise 30 degrees in the next few hours. My joints are already starting to hurt.

I don't like to talk about household-related fears here, but fears are there. I will get through them by focusing on E.

Good morning, world. I declare: Today will be a fun day.

Mama Coyote

Love and Fear

I'm afraid right now. It seems like everything is falling apart around my ears. I love my family so much and so many things are hard right now... There is so much in the way of negative feelings. I feel like we should be mourning, as well as celebrating, Ap together. Instead, it feels like there is hand biting and anger. And it gets directed at the nearest targets. Unfortunately, we are each the nearest target. And it hurts so much.

Please... hear my pleas -- I cannot deal with any more disruption in the family. Let us love together...

"You can't take the sky from me..."

Gaining Weight

I felt kind of stupid just now when I typed "gain 8 pounds" into my Goals at DailyStrength. Eight pounds doesn't sound like much, but that's nearly 10% of my bodyweight.

And food just seems so disgusting lately, and that is not okay. Food is practically my religion... not wanting to partake makes me very, very sad! :p

Ah, well. Solutions will be found.

Mama Coyote

6am

I like being awake at 6am, when no one else is awake and I can stare at my computer for a while. I have goals this month, and they involve writing more and decluttering more and loving more. If I woke up at 6am every day, I could potentially write a blog post, a Squidoo article, and relax with some tea.

In theory, I should be able to find that time during the day anyway. It's just a matter of letting myself not get overwhelmed by everything else in my world.

ChildFind is coming here on the 16th, to see how E is doing. I still want to install the therapy swing in his room. With the funeral and Jes and Emo moving in and most of us being pretty much out of it, I completely forgot half the things ChildFind wanted me to implement. But E's communication has improved anyway. And he's moved from a high chair to a booster seat!

I'm trying to figure out how to use one sensory issue against another: E uses his hands to put food on spoons or forks, and food ends up everywhere. Then he holds up his hands and says, "Wash hands."

He's having trouble with utensils, but doesn't want his hands to be messy. There's got to be a way to reconcile these two things ;)

The sun is coming up, and a freight train is rumbling by, shaking the house and whistling its good-morning. I'm going to move on to other morning tasks, and try to make this a good day.

Train out there... train on tracks!

Mama Coyote

January = not cool

Hey...

I know it's been a while since I posted. January sucked. I find myself missing Ap all the time. It's hard as hell. Fridays suck extra hard -- this is the time that I would be going down to get him. I spent Thursday nights on the couch so I could get up in the morning (I'm a serious night person) and drive the three hours (or more) to get him. And then, on the way back, he and I would joke and laugh. We'd talk over character concepts. He'd bitch about the week he had at work. I'd listen to him talk about history, conspiracy theories, sci-fi books (I knew the plot of the first two or three Ender books before I cracked Ender's Game), poly stuff, and God knows whatever other subjects.

Combine that with... other issues... It'll be tough.

E makes it easier, though... But I miss him saying "AP!" while pretending to take people's noses. When the "Got your nose" concept comes up, it'll be extra hard.

It'll get better. It's gotta. E remains the light of my life. And he's gotta get into college! If I sink into a realm of depression, he can't get into college.

Daddy C

Elijah and Dragons

So, last night, I got home around 9pm after driving from Charlotte, NC to home. The drive was long but my car made it. This morning, I bring in some of my things. Pillows... Blanket... and my Crimson Chinese Dragon statue. I was showing the statue to Coyote when Elijah comes over and begins saying, "Real Dragon... A real dragon." He touched it and stared at it for a little while. When I took it back and began to take it downstairs, he waved and said, "Bye Dragon." It was one of the cutest things I have seen from him so far.

Elijah is getting better about enunciating words and speaks clearly. He is grown a bit in the week that I havent been here. Uncle Emo is here and has been a big help with the house and the family. Things are moving quick and hectic for this coming weeks. Hopefully, we can all stay slightly sane.

Family is always there

So I'm grieving the loss of Ap terribly. I've known him for 12 or 13 years, I helped him with his school work, I helped him eat, I gave him sanctuary when his parents were insane, and I love him very deeply. I keep remembering all the firsts he had with me. I was the first girl he really kissed and that makes me happy. There are times that I get so deep into the mourning that everything seems dark and bleak. Like I don't deserve to be happy or deserve to be loved, because he can't anymore. Then I start to pull into myself, isolating away from the people who love me. I struggle on a day to day basis to get out of bed and put my next best foot forward. The one thing I need to remind myself of is family is always there. When I hurt they are there to hold me, when I'm angry they are there to calm my flame, and when I'm lonely they give me the love I need to help me get through it. I've been struggling a lot recently, after my mom told me my lifestyle was sick, I've found it really hard to not think that myself. Then I take moments and realize I'm happy here. I'm happy in my home with my family. The most important person in my life right now is E, and the family as a whole is the most important thing in my life. So why do I have such a hard time accepting the love and the happiness. I have to wonder about my life, and think about what events lead up to the fear that rules my life. I do not accept the fear anymore. I want to move past this, I want to be happy and act happy. That is my goal. I will always love you Ap, you meant the world to me, your presence will never be forgotten. I will tell stories of you to E and talk to him about explosives just for you.

Mama K

A moment.

Elijah, in his brand new dinosaur footie pajamas, just threw himself into my arms, said, "Boo nigh!" (Good night!), gave me a kiss, and then climbed up on the couch, wrapped himself up in his Daddy's blanket, and pretended to snore.

Past weeks

These past two weeks have been hard on the family. We all went through the traumatic blow of a death of a family member. It has been an emotional roller coaster to say the least. E behaved most of the time I was there except when he was uber tired. We had a lot of comfort from our friends and family. Only time can heal these wounds, but in my heart, I know he is still around watching over the family he loved so much.

Hello

Hello everyone. Im Jes. Im a new addition to the house and help take care of E while I am there. Thought I would go ahead and make my first post.

Poly Life & Death

How do we deal with the death of one of us?

Uncle Ap died on Daddy B's birthday.

Ap's family, who hated his choice in lifestyle and his choice in family, kept Mama K and Daddy C away from the funeral. Ap's ex-fiance was there, claiming to still be his fiance. In M's face.

My family is hurting.

A packmate is gone.

I howl for him tonight.

I love you, Ap. We love you. We'll see you when you get back.

Mama Coyote

My new heavy work activity/game: Stepping Stones

Equipment:
-two stools, preferably of varying height (three if two people are playing)

Stand on one stool. Pick up the other stool. Set the stool down in the direction you want to go. Cross to the stool you just sat down. Pick up the other stool and move it in the direction you want to go. And so on and on and on :)

Rules:
You cannot touch the floor.
You can touch walls.
Stools can go on carpet, but not tile.
Shoes can go on tile, but not carpet.
Furniture is a walkway.
The game begins whenever you want it to.
The game ends whenever you want it to.

A love note.

To my family in Portland, Seattle, and back at home:

I love you all.

Thank you.

Mama Coyote

Mama Flying!

^^ How we explained that Mama was going away for a few days.

Today, he decided that a small blue elephant is officially "Lumpy" from a Pooh Bear movie. His Roo toy and "Lumpy" played in the car all the way too and from the airport, even re-enacting scenes from the movie. I love that he has the imagination to do that. It's good.

He has also taken a liking to my Tiger. I'll get it back in a week or so once he's forgotten it exists ;)

I love it when he climbs into his chair all by himself because he's hungry. Not quite as awesome as him asking for food, but better than him just running into the kitchen and trying to open cabinets or messing with things on the counter.

Still working on getting him to not put things in the dog's water. He tried to put "Lumpy" in there. Trying to get him to ask to play in water, and giving him a separate bowl to play in. Gonna take time, so we'll see how it goes.

He dumped all of his trains behind the couch today. Ugh. Got them all out, but I'm so short!

And apparently he likes Gummi Bears, but then again, who doesn't?

I'll attempt to post tomorrow, when hopefully I won't have a migraine.

~M

A quote.

"I love Sign Time," said Elijah last night.

When his hands are dirty and he wants them clean, he sings, "Look at my hands, look at my hands, they're dirty." Which is a major improvement from screaming and flailing :)

Last-minute trips

The Trazodone is doing its job better today. No major pain, and a very productive day.

I'm leaving for Portland, OR tomorrow and don't know when I'll be able to post again. Hopefully the family will pick up the slack for me :)

Mama Coyote

A pain day, but still productive.

Celexa to stop the depression, Trazodone to help me sleep, caffeine and nicotine and acetominophen and aspirin to kick the headache caused by the Trazodone. Something is wrong with this picture :p

Hopefully the Trazodone's side effects will wear off in a few days.

Meanwhile, Maddy, Pooh's Heffalump Movie, the psychotic fuzzy white dog, Ancient Egyptian meditation music, and Flylady (7 days of FLYing, after five years of fluttering. yay!) kept me sane today, until the pain meds or the cold air or the nicotine or whatever it was finally kicked in, and now I have a ridiculous number of pounds of "metallic sand" so I can make weighted blankets for myself and the boy, and this post is getting just so rambly now, isn't it?

It was a very productive day, despite the pain. I got through a lot of email, Elijah had lots of play time and conversation time (sort of), and has been very interactive and playful today. No true meltdowns, thankfully. Maddy shrink-wrapped some of the windows, and I did a lot of reading on Sensory Processing Disorder.

And now, it is time to relax. For real, instead of just pretending to relax but instead trying desperately to find out how to help Elijah and myself with our sensory issues.

Goodnight, kitten, goodnight mush, goodnight Internet, goodnight old lady who whispers, "Hush."

Mama Coyote

Opinions of Family

I've been spending most of the day thinking about family and our lovely little boy. A lot about Child Find and the work we have done with E. Most of the time it is a struggle every day to get him to pronounce new words and to express his wants and needs. Having been around other two year olds before I notice the developmental delays that he has. Every day I worry that he will regress back like he has done before, and every day I worry about what sort of help he will need. I watch him play and notice little things that he can't do that other two year olds I have known can do. He works harder to do smaller things, and he still hasn't learned to jump yet.

I watch him go through his fits, the ones where he is freaking out so bad that he hurts himself. I see him stem at times, causing worry and fear on my behalf. Will he be able to have friends and socialize like most NT (neuro typical) children, or will he be considered the weird kid. These fears plague me every day, and most days I can work through them. However, today is a day where I am having trouble actually.

With the Child Find thing happening my fears have been rampaging my thoughts all day. I fear. I fear all the things that any parent would fear when having a child, but often I worry about his development with other children. Having multiple autistic people and sensory integration disorder with multiple adults, I wonder if the Child Find people thought they were learned behaviors much like I have learned behaviors.

Many doctors have often thought I have border line personality disorder because of the way I act and my social blending behavior. However, the current theory of my new doctor is that these are learned behaviors, things that I picked up from having a border line mother. So, what if E's behaviors are learned, but then again what if they aren't? Will he ever learn social cue's that are so easy for me or will he struggle like Ap and A? These are my fears, these are my worries. However, just for today I will let go and let God, for in all truth the Big Guy upstairs is the only one who has all the answers, I'm the one with the questions.

ChildFind & other things.

"If you heard a raven say such horrible things as the ones you may have heard in your day today... would it make you choose your own more carefully around the ones you love?" - Ravens in the Library, SJ Tucker

These words have been stuck in my head for two days now. Usually when words, songs, negative thoughts, etc are racing and repeating in my head, it's because I've had dairy. I can't imagine how that would have happened in the last few days--I've been especially careful--and so I am choosing to hear these words as a message.

---

The Childfind appointment was extremely interesting. The woman who played with Elijah and talked to us was very engaging, very nice, very patient. She and I talked a lot about Sensory Processing Disorder/Sensory Integration Dysfunction, and how it affects Elijah and how it affects everyone else in the household. She was interested in us, and did not dismiss the idea of gfcf. She gave us a list of heavy work activities, and leads on some other resources and some book names. She's sending me some information and a couple of chapters of a book to help with our work with Elijah. I liked her a lot.

On the evaluation front, it looks like they're not especially worried, and may only check up on him again in a few months. They may tag him with Sensory Processing Disorder, which doesn't make him eligible for any services. If we hadn't been doing any work, if we hadn't gone gluten and casein free, I'm pretty sure he would have retreated further than he already had (loss of language, loss of most forms of interaction), and they would have taken one look at him and given all the help necessary.

There are two ways to look at this:
1. Helping Elijah ourselves at home means he won't get the help he needs outside of home.
2. Doing all the work we've done means he won't NEED the extra help outside.

I can make the argument that this is a child who has come back from a loss of language, through so much work from his family. We need help to continue that work. Please, don't dismiss the problems because of the progress and help us. Please. Don't penalize Elijah because we've done so much work with him. Don't penalize us because we've put our hearts and lives and sleep aside so we can take do this work for our child.

Will I remember that next Tuesday?

I have to.

Good morning, world. Today will be a good day.

Mama Coyote

Spinning and Sensory Integration

So, you want to know what's funny? Seeing the toddler try to walk in a straight line after spinning on a chair. And he kept asking for more. :D

Well, we went to the ChildFind appt today. I think the best part of the appointment was when the observer realized how many people in the household seem to have some sort of sensory integration issues. I wonder how many college papers people could write on the dynamics and specifics of this household.

Good Morning.

Time to get ready to go to the ChildFind appointment. I have two dogs and a cat vying for my attention, and no desire to get out of bed ;)

Babysteps... first, warm pajama pants... and then... tea!

Mama Coyote

Just for Today

Just for Today

This conference-approved literature in bookmark form provides meditations and a prayer to help us stay focused on what we can do, “Just For Today.”

JUST FOR TODAY I will try to live through this day only, and not tackle all my problems at once. I can do something for twelve hours that would appall me if I felt that I had to keep it up for a lifetime.

JUST FOR TODAY I will be happy. This assumes to be true what Abraham Lincoln said, that "Most folks are as happy as they make up their minds to be."

JUST FOR TODAY I will adjust myself to what is, and not try to adjust everything to my own desires. I will take my "luck" as it comes, and fit myself to it.

JUST FOR TODAY I will try to strengthen my mind. I will study. I will lean something useful. I will not be a mental loafer. I will read something that requires effort, thought and concentration.

JUST FOR TODAY I will exercise my soul in three ways: I will do somebody a good turn, and not get found out; if anybody knows of it, it will not count. I will do at least two things I don't want to do - just for exercise. I will not show anyone that my feelings are hurt; they may be hurt, but today I will not show it.

JUST FOR TODAY I will be agreeable. I will look as well as I can, dress becomingly, keep my voice low, be courteous, criticize not one bit. I won't find fault with anything, nor try to improve or regulate anybody but myself.

JUST FOR TODAY I will have a program. I may not follow it exactly but I will have it. I will save myself from two pests: hurry and indecision.

JUST FOR TODAY I will have a quiet half hour all by myself and relax. During this half hour, sometime, I will try to get a better perspective on my life.
JUST FOR TODAY I will be unafraid. Especially I will not be afraid to enjoy what is beautiful, and to believe that as I give to the world, so the world will give to me.

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I need a meeting. But then, I always need a meeting.

Fortunately, my home meeting is tonight :)

Just for today...

Mama Coyote

Nap time still needs baby gate

Today E went down for his nap, around 3:30 like his usual time is. However, instead of putting up the baby gate the door was shut. Trying to encourage him to stay in his room even when it is nap time. E comes running out of the room, stops dead in his tracks when he sees us, and then goes running back to his room. Most days it is hard not to laugh because he is just so cute, but I know the laughing encourages the behavior we are trying to break.

Today is a spinning day

We have an awesome comfy chair that spins. E climbed up in it earlier and B started spinning him around. E got off and couldn't even stand straight, but jumped right back up in the chair, saying "again!" So around and around he went, getting off every now and again to see if he could still walk. Then it was Mama's turn, and he spun with her a bit. Made me dizzy just watching it.

We got out bubbles a bit ago. Hearing him say "Bubbles for Maddy!" was kinda awesome, in that awesome kind of way.

GFCF Recipe: Coyote's Egg Salad

This is something I eat as a snack sometimes. I can't give any real proportions--it's all to taste. It's good on gluten-free crackers or your favorite GFCF bread :)

Coyote's Egg Salad

3 boiled eggs
fresh cilantro
lime juice
cayenne pepper, ground
mayonnaise - preferably a vinegar-y one

Mix up, in that order. Eat it right away, or let it sit. It tastes better as it sits.

There you go :)

Mama Coyote